Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Land of Opportunity You Say?

I saw this the other day and at first was tempted to post about it but then I decided against it and have since changed my mind yet once again. You see, the chameleon is in the market for a job but it is not as simple as just looking for any old job-been there, done that-no thanks. As anyone who has read my previous post knows I work in Korea but have traveled the world. I have been all over Europe, Asia, South America and even Australia. Not only do I have a passport that is full of entry and exit stamps but I also speak fluent Korean and Spanish in addition to my native English and I can communicate on various levels in Japanese, Italian, German and can understand Portuguese and a very small amount of French. But I am more than just a linguist, I am able to use sophisticated statistical analysis of complez business issues to improve performance, reduce costs and otherwise reduce defects-something that supposedly is a skill that is in high demand. Nevertheless, here I am with no new jobs and no news from companies that I have done telephone interviews with that I thought went pretty well. I am in a foreign country working for a company that generally takes pretty good care of its employees but sometimes takes serious prodding to get them to keep their commitments and quite frankly I would much rather be back in the US where I can settle down and persue the "American Dream". That includes having my kids get approximately the same quality education that I did and be able to enjoy the outdoors and good weather instead of the substandard everything that exists here in Korea.
So I am left asking myself the question-what did I do to myself to deserve to be cursed like this? why do I have to suffer like this? To those people that believe that "there is a reason for everything" and "we are where we are because someone else needs us there" I have to ask: does that include the children of those that have according to your screwed up system of rationalising things? Does that also include the financial future and prosperity? In your screwed up belief system is there anything I can choose for myself? Even the Buddhists that believe in destiny believe that suffering can be overcome through wisdom and knowledge and they believe in destiny... No I am not trying to attach anyone's beliefe system but I am at a point where I question very seriously why things are not going the way I invision them and so the particular belief system I use to understand and cope with my unhappy lot in life becomes very important. If I subscribe to the view that there is a higher power moving us around like little pawns in his game of chess than I might conclude that higher power is awfully bored or sadistic to be using my tortures as entertainment. If I subscribe to the mindset that the higher power is indeed like a loving parent that wants to give me all the nice things in life, protect me from the bad and help me learn in as safe a way as possible than I might have to conclude that heavenly being does not love me or has decided not to give me those good things in life. If I choose not to believe in a higher power at all than I have to conclude that somewhere I screwed up. No matter what, I am not finding a positive spin for this. Anyway, I am pretty discouraged about it.


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